So… here’s what I’m thinking…

Unleash the beast…

March 4, 2010 · 9 Comments

*blows the dust off the keyboard*
My happy Olympic glow has worn off, so it’s time to unleash the “ragin’ Canadian” me thinks…

This blog is not going to be filled with warm fuzzies, ass kissing or “oh
goody” kumbyfuckingya sentiments. So if you’re all about the “up with
people” cheerleader vibe that seems to be permeating Bloggerville while I’ve been on hiatus, spin thyself around and head back out the
door cause you my friend are in the wrong room…

Now with that out of the way, let’s get this down to it…

So, I don’t know about anyone else, but the end of the 09 season left me
feeling a little, no, a lot, non-plussed.

It used to make me sad when the season came to a close, wondering what the fuck I was going to do with my weekends until the start of the next season.

In 2009 I couldn’t wait for the season to be put out of it’s misery, and ours. Sure there were some bright spots sprinkled here and there, enough to engage the disappearing masses to stick around a little while longer, but mostly it was old, tired, predictable, boring, tedious & frustrating.

I’m not just talking about IndyCar either. All of the AOW series seemed to chug along unimpressively in 09 leaving little reason to keep up & even littler (my word) reason to return. (thus my extended leave)

The major underlying theme of 09, besides the vilifying then deifying of twinkletoes, was “will she or won’t she move to Nascar” Well apparently she will and she has. (sort of)
(Sarcasm) Yay for everyone! (/sarcasm)
So now instead of just IndyCar spending 80% of their marketing budget on “Danican’t the Overrated”, we’ll now have Napcar wasting a good chunk of coin trying to convince the ignorant stock car masses to tune in to watch the anointed one under perform at all their tracks. All Princess Sparkle Pony
all the time. Oi, there’s that headache again…

Unless you live under a rock you were more than aware of the Princess’ ARCA & Nationwide debuts . If you looked and listened closely you might have heard there were one or two other drivers in those races too. The sycophantic ravings of the fanica’s in the booth were both unprofessional and nauseating. I felt like I spent hours listening to DW whack off, and felt dirty for hours afterwards. Get a room man! While I’m man enough (ok, woman enough, whatever…) to admit she held her own in her ARCA debut (and got really lucky with that spin) There were several other drivers out there, of both genders, that also hold their own every week but are done a horrible disservice by the media & broadcast teams. The only good thing about all of this is that there is a small crack in the fluffy bunny & rainbows stepford version of the Danica franchise now that the ink is dry on both contracts, and her evil nemesis Princess Perma Pout is lurking just below the surface. Hmmm… It could become entertaining after all… But enough about Nascrap, moving on…

So here we are on the precipice of 2010… 1 new race that I’m still not convinced is a good thing, 1 extremely tired formula, 2 dominating superteams, many field fillers, half a dozen great drivers without rides, half a dozen mediocre drivers with rides (maybe) and a new CEO that has NEVER even been to a race. (what is it btw with these CEO’s that speak like they gargled Valium before their interviews? Seriously people, get a media coach or something…)

For those willing to suspend reality for 2 more years, the new year saw the reveal of several new cars in development for 2010, including the much hyped and now unveiled “Dildo Wing” er “Delta Wang” er whatever… (I’m still finding it hard to type anything about it with my eyes rolled back so far in my head at it’s mention…) One can only hope that sanity will prevail and one or more of the more reasonable designs from Lola or Swift will be adopted.

Not only is the IndyCar series suffering from lack of, well, everything! But the junior formula’s are in equally dire straights. We are but a couple of weeks from dropping the flag on 2010 and there isn’t one series with a complete line up of teams and drivers. Not surprisingly the Atlantics aren’t going to answer the bell this year. The tactic of going to Europe to sucker er… “test” european teams/drivers into participating was clever though once most of the N.American teams were twice bitten thrice shy when it came to participating and actually receiving something for their effort.
How you enjoying that million dollar payout J-Ed?
Ya that’s what I thought.

The latest kerfuffle that has everyone’s big girl panties in a wad (most of them male ironically) is that the golden child with the pedigreed name, but lackluster track record, is sitting on the sidelines (by choice!) while Milka Duno has been announced for the full monty in 2010 with Uncle Dale.

Hey, if Graham Crackers would rather hold out for the highest bidder on the wink and nod that he’ll be in one of the the red cars in 2011, that’s his prerogative. Just don’t invite us to the pity party because Milk & Donuts seized the opportunity to actually drive a race car this season that you tossed aside.

For all of those saying that Dale should have given him a 1 year contract instead of 2, give your fucking heads a shake. Why should Dale go through the expense and effort to house yet ANOTHER driver who is there by default and who will take his sponsors and bail at the end of one season. Puleese. Good for Dale for not allowing himself to be treated like a doormat. The ride was offered and turned down. Period. I’m sure Milka will be honoured to drive for Dale. And good for him for putting her in the seat for the full season. I bet she will learn a lot under his tutelage.

Note for any other driver putting all of their eggs in one basket based on the promise of something in the future: NEWSFLASH, there IS NO GUARANTEE OF A FUTURE in ANY of these series. Just ask the teams, and drivers, and staff who had the rugs pulled out from under them with the speed and skill of a bullfighter over the last couple of years. ChampCar, FBMW, Atlantics, USF1, etc… etc… etc…

Take what is offered to you, when it is offered to you, because you may not get another chance.

I weep for the future of racing.

→ 9 CommentsCategories: general racing

Ode to the Penis car…

February 10, 2010 · 24 Comments

*for Bash* (sung to the tune of Delta Dawn – Helen Reddy)

“it was 2 o’clock when we gathered for your unveiling…
“this is Indy’s future” they were wailing…
then they pulled back that red satin from your skin…
and the laughing, gasps and joking did begin…

“Delta Schlong”, oh my god that just looks wrong.
Could it be we’re being punked by Demi’s guy?
This supersonic wang ain’t gonna bring the fans back again
let’s give this strange device a wave good-bye, eye…..

feel free to continue on your own ;-)

*those of you too young to know who Helen Reddy is… A) I hate you B) Google it! *

→ 24 CommentsCategories: general racing
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10 years gone, a lifetime remembered…

October 31, 2009 · 9 Comments

At just 24, Greg Moore was a shining star, both on and off the track. Extremely gifted, mature beyond his years, and well liked and respected by everyone in the paddock… the surface had barely been scratched on his potential.

Just weeks before his tragic death, he had announced that he had signed with Penske Racing for the following season. One can only wistfully imagine what he would have accomplished in the years ahead…

In this day and age where drivers & teams make headlines for cheating, and petulant tantrums, and litigation, and mug shots, it makes looking back on what happened and what might have been an even more bitter pill to swallow.

Always composed, always gracious, always smiling.
Gone in an instant. Remembered forever.

Tony DiZinno wrote a great piece on Greg this week, please take a moment to give it a read: link

For those that are not aware of who Greg was and why he leaves such a lasting legacy for someone who left us at such a young age, the following collection of videos will enlighten you…

*EDIT* sadly someone saw fit to remove the videos from YouTube recently. Heartless bastards.

Greg Moore: A Racer’s Story Part 1

Greg Moore: A Racer’s Story Part 2

Greg Moore: A Racer’s Story Part 3

Greg Moore: A Racer’s Story Part 4

Greg Moore: A Racer’s Story Part 5

Greg Moore: A Racer’s Story Part 6

The heartbreaking crash and live broadcast announcement

ESPN tribute on the day of the accident

Awesome tribute with tons of race footage

→ 9 CommentsCategories: general racing

Homestead Season Finale *Live Blog*

October 10, 2009 · 23 Comments

Ok, so we’re 10 laps in. I’ll catch you up. Red car, red car, red car… driving around in circles. There, you’re caught up.

Seems an odd time to be running a race. For some reason I thought this was a night race, so I was off enjoying a lovely fall day at the market in preparation for Thanksgiving (yes, we canucks celebrate it this weekend) Just made it home on time.

Lap 17: ooooh… FROchitti washes up and drops like a stone to 3rd, allowing Briscoe to get by for 2nd. Dixon leads.

LOL… oh Bob… Danica hasn’t run the Blue/black livery since before Indy. Pay attention dude.

Lap 23: much discussion about Danica wasting her overtake button pushes.

commercial (lets see what the radio guys are talking about… oh suprise… Danica…)

Lap 33: back. talking about pit stops, which may or may not be coming up. . L

Lap 44: pit stops have begun.

hmmmm… my feed got all wack and delayed.

Lap 54: Briscoe and Dixon are battling up front, Dario about 4 car lengths behind.

commercial

Field is now lapped up to 8th position. :shakes head:

Lap 62? Parko is sitting on pitlane. Brakes are smoking like mad. oops, strike that, they’re on fire. Thanks for coming out. See you in 2010.

Lap 68: Briscoe is now in the lead, and traversing through traffic. Come on Ryan!!!

oooh! someone is “working the tools” DRINK!

(for those that care, the beer of the race, other than myself, har har, is Ephemere)

oh Bob… so much excitement for Dixon lapping Helio… *snicker* “Oh Bob” is my drinking game today fyi

Lap 84/200: Briscoe is lapping the field left right and centre, and very very high. Probably a little too high for hte captain’s liking.

I’m snacking on prosciutto and figs… too fancy for race day?

Lap 97: Briscoe and Dixon both on pitlane. Briscoe out first.

Dario stays out a couple of more laps then comes in.

Lap 101: Briscoe retains the lead. Ok… must find someone good at stats to break it down for me.

Apparently Versus is putting in as many commercials as they can today. *switches to radio* hey did you know Justin Wilson is in this race?

Lap 108: Dixon back out front. Nice battle up front. Dixon is on rails since the last pitstop.

Lap 112: Dixon pulling away bigtime.

Lap 118: Do, Dixxy and Briscoe will likely have to pit again. Dashley may not have to… hmmm…

Lap 124: Briscoe blows by Dixon! Sweet!! atta boy!

Lap 132: Rooting for Ryan. Come on kiddo! get those bonus points!

Lap 144: Briscoe and Dixon on pitlane. Briscoe out first again!

Lap 147: much talk of Dashley and fuel strategy.

Lap 148: Oh Bob! *drinks* way to jinx the race dude!

*side note* being set up in the kitchen is convenient for refills… just sayin…

OH! LOL! Danica and Wheldon the rematch! Panther crew releases Danny boy into the path of the Princess and spins her around on pitlane.

Danica’s day is probably done.

Holy blinding glare coming down pitlane. Again I reiterate, what a stupid time to have a race.

Lap: 161/200: 39 to go….

Lap 167/200: Briscoe now has the laps lead bonus. But Dashley is toiling around 18 seconds behind saving fuel like a bandit. Great. A fuel strategy win/championship coming up. Gross.
I’d rather see drivers go balls to the wall and win it on the track and on merit.

I wonder how Dixon feels to have been sacrificed in favour of Dashley.

Dixon and Dashley both have to pit

Well there ya go. This just sums up the season. Red. Predictable. Fuel saving. Maybe next year the focus will be on racing.

→ 23 CommentsCategories: general racing

Japan Indy 300 *LIVE* race blog

September 18, 2009 · 26 Comments

Well howdy do kids! Allow me to introduce myself. I’m Meesh. I used to be a racing blogger. No really…

*sigh* Life happens eh?

Anyway, I’ve been working since 8:30am this morning. Started in the office, then off to shoot a wedding. Just got dropped off back at the office cause it would take to long to get home and I would miss stuff… (ya, I’m that dedicated) (ok, not really, it’s just that the computer is bigger and the signal is better at the office, and if I go home, my tired eyes would have to deal with a 12 inch screen and shitty wireless)

ok… sorry distracted there… nothing says pre-race like watching a Moraes adjust his nut sack… no seriously. Total close up of him crunching his kibbles and bits up before getting in the car. They all do it. I usually turn away and drop my camera down at the track so they don’t think I’m being pervy… LOL!

Engines started… cars on track… moments away from starting…
I wish I was more excited.
No really. I feel so far removed from everything right now.

What the fuck? The stands are empty.

Here we go! Green green Green!!

wow… Dixon shot out of a canon. Moraes couldn’t find the the gas peddle. FROchitti got around for second.

Parko up 7 positions from the start.
Barrett dead fucking last :mocks surprise:

Lap 8. wow… I’m bored already.

ooh… pass for 8th! With a little “weehoo!” from the booth for good measure.

*commercial* I think I’ll nap

back…

Briscoe is pitstoplimiterless apparently, which could come into play during pit stops. (duh)
Carpenter is going the wrong way. (down 7 notches from the start)
Kanaan had a weird bobble.
Wheldon inhales the Princess, on camera no less. My viewing is enhanced! LOL!

*commercial*

30/200 done.
Rahal is now stalking the Princess. Why do these cars look so slow?
Wheldon is moving in on Briscoe. My “Briscoe for 2009 champion” fantasy is not looking good this weekend.

woah! Wheldon gets alongside and NO. Briscoe slams the door! Now he’s dropped like a stone.
Speaking of dropping like a stone… Doornbos 22nd… ick.

BWAHAHAHAHA! The Princess has used 10 of her 20 push to protect blasts. That can’t bode well.

Lap 47, Pit stops starting. Moraes in. Bad stop. Fairytale race going to hell in a handbasket.

Justin Wilson gets some air time!

serious clusterfuckage on pit road. Dixon gets stuck in a slow parade of pitstoppers. Franchitti gets in an extra lap.

ooooh… the Ganasty boys are actually racing each other. Making it interesting. Franchitti has the advantage, but Dixon ain’t gonna make it easy on him.

word just came through that Moraes only got a half load of fuel. Insult to injury there as he also lost 3 spots on that stop.

*commercial* (both tv and radio… gah! I hate when they do that!)

back.. 64/200 (thankfully this is blowing by fast.. which means I’ll be heading home to bed soon…)

wow… ed… not having a good run. Bring back the yellow car!!

Yasukawa is -14laps… “brake issues”. Thanks for coming out.

74/200 complete. I’m fading. This is agonizingly boring.
Moraes back in for more fuel. Lights em up bigtime leaving the pits.

everyone is mentioning “caution free” racing, which means debris (real or imagined) in 3…2…

Sheckter out of the car. thanks for coming out.
Matsuura has a huge “moment”. Manages not turn the car into spare parts. He is however a moving chicane.
Speaking of chicanes, Carpenter is NOT having a good race. Practically stopped on track a minute ago.

96/200…. put me out of my misery. *resists urge to lay head on desk just to rest my eyes…*

102/200… many pit stops happening. So far all good. Oh, and Dixon is back out in the lead.

Briscoe making huge fuel. Ran a bunch of laps more than the leaders.
CAUTION!
Did he just get fubared?? NO, he made it to the line before the caution! Woot!!
NO. What the fuck!? Total brain fade on the exit. Pulled a Will Power (Surfers 08) Threw it away all on his own. Drove almost nose first into the wall at pit out. Picked up the Timing Cone in the process.

Drive through to look for damage. Looks ok despite hard hit. Cone wedged in the suspension however.

oh ya, Conway was the one that stuffed it to bring out the caution. :mocks surprise:
Hope that kid doesn’t pay for crash damage…. just sayin…

*commercial*

Briscoe is back in the pits. now several laps down, watching the crew frantically replace the right front of the car, while the laps tick off, and the championship fades from sight… (I do love how the crew are scrambling, despite the odds)

118/200 GREEN GREEN GREEN!

124/200 – Rahal on the button to get around the Princess for 6th.
Briscoe back on track as the rest of the field blows by…

130/200 – The brats are racing each other. Princess down to 9th now behind Parko.

Briscoe on pitlane … again… Double checking that the car is safe to drive at full song. Off and away again.

Rahal is pushing to pass his way through the field… Moraes is riding his coat tails and coming along for the ride.

144/200 – I’m seriously so tired I could cry….

153/200 – back from commercial. Still tired. Still bored. Still can’t believe Briscoe’s luck. (although on the replay, it does look like something was off on that car. Like something broke or stuck. Not your usual “squiggle” action)

Final pits in action… welllllllllllllll…. the Ganasty boys are in together for the first time this race. This could get interesting! “mano e mano”

YELLOW YELLOW YELLOW!

RHR hard into the wall. Messy but he’s ok. Out under his own steam.

Dixon wins the pitlane battle, continues to lead (and earn bonus points)

Great… VERSUS is now doing Napcar coverage… This is like SPEED and ESPN all over again…

I’m thirty laps from getting to go home and go to bed. (of course the commute will take for fucking ever… )

See… so tired, totally missed the restart. Thankfully for me, they fucked it up, and are having to do it again.

173/200 – GREEN GREEN GREEN!

lots of scrambling.

Servia working the button! Rahal, Servia, & Moraes keeping it interesting behind the leaders who are already at the bar having cocktails. (ok, not really, but they might as well)

181/200 – drive faster! I’m tired damnit!

*commercial*

*bathroom break (can’t hold it any longer)*

back…

6 laps to go… thank god. Of course the Subway shuts down soon, which means all night streetcar to go home…

2 to go… put us out of our misery…

Dixon wins! :mocks surprise:
Franchitti second! :woooo! *yawn*:
Rahal third! *meh*

Briscoe plummets to 3rd in standings. The championship will be decided in Homestead.

Rahal admits that they had no radio for the race, but kept it “hush hush”. Does he think no one of any importance will be watching/listening to his post race interview?

aww bless… poor Briscoe. Good attitude though.

ok… I’m shutting down. I have a brutal commute home on the streetcar with all the drunk Friday night party goers, and I’ve now put in a 17hr day. I’m toast.

more tomorrow… night all

→ 26 CommentsCategories: general racing