I answered: “a quiet lake in the Muskoka’s, so we could go fishing in the wee hours just like when I was a kid. We would sit silently catching a mess of perch, then chat incessantly as we paddled back to shore to cook our breakfast over an open fire.”
Yes, it’s Father’s Day, and I will spend this day trying to distract myself from feeling the giant void in my life, which will be hard to do whether I venture out for the day, bumping into the many families celebrating, or stay cocooned in my apartment surrounded by my own memories.
17yrs he’s been gone, and yet as I write this the tears come as quickly and the chest squeezes as tightly as if it were yesterday.
I wrote about my dad and our racing connection here last year. I won’t rehash it as the story is, of course, the same, though I’m happy to say I’m personally in a better place this year then I was a year ago. Nonetheless, it’s equally as empty without him when life is going well, as there is no one to share my news and accomplishments with.
Anyway, to all of the drivers who are daddies: Helio, Rubens, Scott, Tony Takuma, Justin, and Ed. And to all my favorite driver daddies who give me the big hugs I cherish so on race weekend (Papa Hinch, Papa Viso, and Papa Wilson when he’s stateside) and to all of you, my tweeps, and fellow bloggers, and readers, who are daddies, and will be celebrating your daddies today, I wish you the happiest of days with your families. Please spend the day being in the moment, and laughing, and hugging and loving.
And remember it’s not about big gestures or big gifts, but rather about making memories, and taking snapshots with your heart.
I can’t tell you what I gifts I bought my dad over the years, or what he bought me, but I can tell you that when I was a kid we would go camping on a quiet lake in the Muskoka’s, and we would go fishing in the wee hours, just the two of us, where we would sit silently catching a mess of perch, then we would chat incessantly as we paddled back to shore to cook our breakfast over an open fire…
*sigh* I miss him so…