Infin-ee-*yawn* the not so *live* blog…

Alright, so I was working on Sunday when the race was live via computer, so I had to depend on my DVR to tape the race at MIDNIGHT (fuck you TSN) while I slept in preparation for work the next morning. So… here is the not so live blog commentary of Sunday’s race.

So, my DVR taped for 2hrs… 12 mins in, I finally am seeing some race cars. I’m not sure yet if the race started or if this is pre-race stuff…

Ok.. so they just showed an overhead shot of what looks like a barren desert with a track in the middle of it and used the term “picturesque” to describe the track. bwhahaha! bit of a stretch there boys.

ok.. so apparently this is the 2nd pace lap. (and apparently it hasn’t rained in Sonoma County since 1972)

The theme of today’s race is apparently “all Penske, all the time!”

Here they come all lined up… sort of… Green green green! Twinkletoes looks like he was shot out of a canon. Gee, surprise, surprise, Briscoe didn’t challenge him for the lead.

OMG… were one lap in and I want to stab myself in the ear with a letter opener.

LOL Junqueira “cuts the corner” riiiiiiiight or.. how bout Wheldon squeezes him off but he recovers nicely.

Speaking of cutting corners and dirty driving, I can’t believe that they let the results stand for the Indy Lights race Sunday. Rafa snowplowed Antinucci! That was ridiculous! but I digress…
(actually that race was a lot more interesting than this one… to be truthful)

Instinctively I mute my tv and turn the sound up on my computer, but of course I don’t have the option of the IMS commentary being that it’s two days later. I want to cry… I can’t take it. Goodyear and Reid are awful. AWFUL!!! Their monotone drone is putting me into a trance. The only thing worse is the whiny drone of the car. Christ they sound particularly horrible today.

Could Monotone Marty cast any more aspersions on this race and the eventual outcome?? Made some snide remark about the start (leave that to the bloggers Martyman) now he’s using the term “hollywood ending”

commercial break: Lap 5
back from commercial: Lap 23
fuck you very much TSN

The camera work at this track is horrifyingly bad. I’m particularly impressed with the camera shot that gets blocked by the bridge each time…

“Danica also struggling with handling her race car” bwhahahaha… no shit sherlock. Why should today be any different than any other race.

Brienne is about 4 sentences away from completely losing her voice. I want to hand her a lozenge through the tv. Someone needs to teach the girl how to support her sound. (as a singer I guess I could… but would she listen?)

Ok.. the old dude doing the pit reporting (the one that’s not the Brie or Vince) is awful. Stuttering, mispronouncing names, pausing awkwardly.

OMG alert the media, Danica is coming in for a perfectly trivial pit stop!! Thank god they showed that and described it in all it’s mundane glory.

Could the ticker be any lower on the screen? Add to that the scrolling ticker on the bottom (fuck you very much again TSN) and I feel like I’m watching this race while squinting.

EJ!! You go you sweet hot young thing! (oops… was that my outer voice?)

Here here on the anonymous owner saying he would hire EJ. Damn right! You want someone who is going to go out there and race damnit! We get the EJ bumper to commercial, sweet!

commercial break: Lap 30
back from commercial: Lap 32
not bad…

The role of Sir Blocks-a-lot in tonight’s race will be played by Enrique Bernoldi

“Eric Bernoldi??” Nice. Dumbass. Wait a sec? Did Snotty just say “Jack”? Is the one making all the mistakes in pitlane who sounds about 100 yrs old Arute?? Was he drinking during the broadcast or something?! Good God man, go have a nap.

EJ doing some locks-em-up drifting in the corners! Nice save.

speaking of corners, they reeeeeeeeeeeally slow down in some of them on this track.

commercial break: Lap 35
back from commercial: Lap 36

Holy crap, that totally is Arute. He sounds AWFUL! I don’t even know (or care) what he just said.

Who WHO chose these camera angles? No really, who? I would like to know so I can find them and bitch slap them.

Hey, whadda ya know, they’re talking about Team Penske again…

wow… even I’m bored. Where are the close battles? Where is the passing?

No no NO… what was that??? Random Scott Dixon montage with that horrifying “I am Mindy” song then abrupt cut to commercial. LOL!

commercial break: Lap 40
back from commercial: Lap 42

Twinkletoes is 15 seconds ahead of the pack. LOL… zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Marty Reid is taking great glee in tossing out all of the why Helio won’t win facts, while insisting he doesn’t want to jinx him. (pictures Marty with a tiny voodoo doll)

hey, did you know that Penske had a transporter fire? No really. I heard it during the broadcast. ABOUT A MILLION FUCKING TIMES!!

LOL… they desperately held on to a really bad camera angle to show Kanaan and Servia “battle” (actually they’re just driving close to each other, but it’s the most interesting thing on track at the moment)

another mention of the “pitlane bump” and the Penske fire. (should be a drinking game)

“laps in hand” what a stupid fucking phrase to overuse there Marty.

I’m pretty sure Marty just spiked a boner because Junky got squiggly on the “pitlane bump” Marty’s so fond of.

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA… hey did ya know that Oriol was called into the pits for 4 tires and a full load of fuel?? Gee what would I do without that stellar pit reporting. :bangs head on desk:

commercial break: Lap 47
back from commercial: Lap 49

Marty: When did you know it was time to hang it up
Scott: when I realized how badly I sucked.
(ok, he didn’t say that, but…)

I can’t believe they are doing another on-board lap and describing it… again…

commercial break: Lap 51
back from commercial: Lap 53

Um.. since when did they start to refer to the crewmen by name during pit stops? that was weird.

Ok seriously, I’m almost too bored to type. What is the point of having 24 (26?) cars in the race when you only talk about 4 of them? Names not heard in reference to the race: Scheckter, Bell, Meira, Andretti, Camara… are they even still running?

commercial break: Lap 55
back from commercial: Lap 58

IT’S ALIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVE! Mutoh gets his first mention of the race!

Will Power gets a drive through penalty for taking his 3rd excursion through the runoff/chicane thingy. Get your head in the game mate! You’ve got the car and the talent, you just need to take advantage of both at the same time.

EJ in the lead again! Atta boy! LOL.. for one lap, but at least he got airtime!
The HVM pit starts dancing… “nah nah nah nah nah nah nah nah… gittin Wiggy wid it”

and Marty is on and on again about the Hollywood ending… and off we go to commercial. Yup. I got one exciting lap of racing, which showed… no racing.

commercial break: Lap 59
back from commercial: Lap 63

and we’re back! Just in time to show a laundry list of Nascar race dates ???? WTF??

I swear they keep calling him “Brian Briscoe”

Hey, didja hear? Penske fire! *falls over in fits of laughter* (I’m getting punchy now)

are the on-board camera’s not working? I swear I haven’t seen more than 3 onboard shots. And no pit radio discussion. Just the endless and needless non-stop chatter from Snotty and Smarmy. SNORE!

commercial break: Lap 63 (yup barely a lap that time)
back from commercial: Lap 66

according to the scrolling thingy, Darren Manning is also in this race as is Ed Carpenter! Oh, and that Scheckter guy is out. No explanation.


At this point I fell asleep.
Truth be told this was my second attempt at watching this race.
I held off on posting this figuring I would try to finish it tonight, but you know what? Fuck it. I know the outcome. I can’t imagine anything remotely interesting happened in the last 20 laps (or whether or not TSN actually showed them) I saw all the post race interviews on Speed Report, so I don’t care anymore.

Now that I’ve seen this track, I agree… it’s kinda sucky. Of course the pigs that are the IndyCar’s don’t really allow for great racing, so it could be an unfair assessment as the Indy Lights and Grand AM races didn’t induce comas… just sayin is all.

Anyway, enough of that mess. I’m looking forward now. Detroit baby! 48 hrs from now I will be heading to the train station. It’s like crack this racing thing. Can’t get enough of it. Although looking at the actual schedule for the weekend, I’m not really going to get a whole hell of a lot of it. An hour of practice and 90 mins of qualies on Saturday. 1/2 hr warm up and 90 laps on Sunday. Oh and the rest of the track time goes to the ALMS and the Speed GT’s. I guess that leaves me more time to eavesdrop and write and visit and take pictures and just soak it all in.

16 responses to “Infin-ee-*yawn* the not so *live* blog…

  1. Infineon is a wonderful track to drive. I love driving the IRL layout, personally – except in a Skip Barber R/T 2000 it’s a whole lot more fun than I expect an IndyCar to be.

    But it’s a fucking desert. There’s no other way to say it. The “picturesque” bullshit they foist on you is due to the local wineries, but outside of those it’s really barren and ugly-looking. IMO of course.

    In fairness it wasn’t so bad before Bruton Smith bought the place. There was grass and trees and green stuff along with rolling hills and so forth. But it all got bulldozed to promote better sight lines (*snort*). Sigh.

  2. Now you know why I fell asleep. I honestly tried to watch it. I had to watch the rest via timing and scoring because I couldn’t handle the actual broadcast.

    I also noticed the “Eric Bernoldi” reference a number of times.

  3. Thank goodness I followed the race via T&S in addition to the race broadcast. Something about seeing the sector times, pit in laps, and little green and red dots is addicting. Odd. I’m just glad to see Helio win. That helped.

    Maybe I’m just going crazy or what but I didn’t think it was THAT boring. Again, there’s the T&S caveat but yeah. :/

  4. Then again, watching the Grand-Am and ALMS races may make me change my mind. 😛

  5. the boredom stems from the coma boys in the booth…. A boring race can at least be made to sound exciting by the commentators. (hello… ever watch Nascar race?) That’s why I listen to the IMS radio.

    Ya, T&S might have helped…

  6. Hey Meesh, you know how slack I am in the communication department – must be an Aussie trait – so I apologize for the sparseness in the email department of late. Have a great weekend in Detroit and we’ll see you in around 50 days time for Surfers – right…;)

  7. I’ve just stayed up to watch the recording (its now 12:40am).
    I really wish I’d waited until tomorrow and got the extra bit of sleep. Damn. I, ahem, ‘acquire’ the US version of the race and it was terrible this time. Possibly the worst of the year in terms of race coverage (although there was that one earlier along). At least it’ll be Friday tomorrow.

  8. Apparently, the drivers (well, TK at least) were blah-ing about the race as well:

    I agree with Robin that even with new cars the tracks have to be racier either by renovating them or by going to venues which promote that sort of racing.

    There’s also a breif on Johnny Parsons, Jr. on page 1, fwiw.

  9. Macca! hello Mate! ha! I wish I was going to see you in 50 days time! *sigh*… I fear I will never see Surfer’s now… 😦

    LOL PatW… can’t say we didn’t warn you!

    It’s nice to hear the drivers saying they want a new car and new engine. Again, one has to wonder why they didn’t keep the DP01’s & cossies for the road courses and the the shit boxes for the ovals.

  10. Hey again Meesh, I wrote this piece a couple of weeks back in regards to Surfers 09 and beyond, you and your loyal band of readers are more than likely already aware of the information here, but thought I’d post it anyway from an Aussie perspective:

    It’s great to see that the IndyCar Series have confirmed their participation at this year’s Surfers event, I do however, hold grave concerns for the future of the series coming to Australia unless the original October date is reinstated. The October date has always been a huge financial gain for the Gold Coast economy as it compensates for a lull in tourism from the end of the September school holidays through to the warmer mid-November / early-December months.

    Having spoken with the IndyCar people since the 2009 schedule announcement, they ensure me that the series is making every effort to tie in the Motegi 2009 race date with a trip to Surfers. However, the weekend after Motegi is right smack-bang in the middle of the Queensland school holidays, is the Aussie Rules (AFL football) grand-final weekend, is with the major preliminary Rugby League (NRL) finals weekend, AND, it’s just two weeks prior to the V8’s ‘jewel-in-the-crown’ Bathurst race!!!

    The weekend before Motegi is more suited, but having spoken with a former Champ Car Director involved with the transformation of that series to Surfers Paradise over many years, he deems it as near-impossible ‘logistics-wise’ to get everything ‘Down Under’ just a few short days following the Belle Isle Park race the Sunday prior – plus the V8’s seemingly are committed to Phillip Island that weekend.

    I do hope I’m wrong here, but did someone say that the A1GP would love to kick-off their Australasian-leg of the 2009-10 season with a trip to Surfers Paradise on the traditional Gold Coast Indy October weekend????


  11. Also, Kanaan mentioned similar dissatisfaction about the racing at Kansas earlier in the year.

    They did announce that they’ll use alternate tires on the road and street courses next year.

    One last comment (I swear!!) , I just hope this rebuilding project goes well. I’ll be there all the way. 🙂

  12. Thanks for the info, Macca.

  13. LOL! Evan, don’t apologize for commenting! Comment as nuch as you like!

    Macca, thanks for posting that! Major fubar on the IRL’s part…

  14. Macca, why is it a bad thing to hold the race in the middle of the school holiday – wouldn’t that help attendance? I get that they don’t want to go up against other big events but I’m curious about that one.

  15. G’day Pat,

    Surfers Paradise thrives on tourism and as stated there is generally a lull in the number of holiday-makers after the September school holidays through to the warmer mid-November early-December months.

    During the September school holidays the place is solidly booked throughout the entire two-week period by the ‘Mums and Dads and their 2.5 kids’. And whilst I don’t doubt that there would be still a good turnout in turns of numbers, I’m sure that these Mums and Dads would not enjoy the sound of a 3.5-liter, normally aspirated engine blaring through their customarily-tranquil holiday…..not to mention the influx of 300,000+ ‘not-so-sober’ rev-heads combing the streets in ‘I AM INDY’ T-shirts with ‘#7 Danica’ ball caps (through that in for Meesh there) attempting to cover badly sun-burnt faces…….

    Therefore as business, and I’m talking about the whole Gold Coast economy here, you would still want to keep the Mums and Dads during the school holidays as well as the four-day motorsport fans during the leaner times (non school holiday periods) on the tourism calendar.

    Cheers, Macca.

  16. Ah right, that makes sense. Its quite important that the race happens then, but at the right time.
    Thanks for the explanation.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s