The Month of meh…

*warning… Margarita’s, a patio and wifi. Meesh has a belly/mind full of tequila on this holiday Monday here in Canada, so spelling and grammar and “sense” don’t count* *complete thoughts and sentences not guarenteed*

If Pole day was shockingly disappointing, then Bump day was soul crushing.

I still don’t really have the words today to express myself fully. Maybe because real life intervened and I was on an 18hr photo shoot that prevented me from being tethered to my computer to watch this nightmare play out. It still feels like a cruel joke, like someone is punking all of us that live and breath racing and Paul Tracy.

He is in 2003 race trim!! do ANY of you know… can any of you GRASP how hard this man has worked to get to this place?? When I hung out with him in January, I quietly, silently, questioned whether he still had the fire in his belly. He seemed defeated, and a little flubby at the time. Almost complacent about racing and his future. Then it was like someone lit a fire under him.

How cruel the universe that would see fit to exclude Paul from this race, after he devoted himself heart and soul to being championship ready and worthy.

How cruel the universe that sees fit to see him sitting on the sidelines instead of driving fulltime.

How cruel the universe.

Paul showed heartbreaking honesty and class in his Racermag Blog in the aftermath. Jimmy showed culpability in his apology to Paul’s fans for not getting him in the show. Winning as a team. Losing as a team. I get that. I appreciate that.

I’ll appreciate it more if they can take the Geico money and put Paul in a car at the Glen as a precursor to Toronto… *hint hint*

That said, I can’t help but wonder if KV tech bit off a little more than they were capable of chewing. 3 fulltime wrecking balls er drivers,  a likely very over worked crew. Not enough frankencars to cover the damage… I have to wonder outloud if Paul would have been better off with a one-off single car team effort (a la RLR) where the focus would have been solely on him and getting that car in the show.

“what if’s” don’t amount to a hill o’beans after the fact.

I can tell ya that the bitter pill of not being able to make it to Indy this year, was definitely easier to swallow this morning. Watching races containing a Paul Tracy-less field… not so much exciting or interesting to me. I definitely felt that at St. Pete’s. I will however been cheering for Simona and Bia. I’m tickled pink for Bruno and Sebastien, and will be over the moon if Justin can quietly make his way into the hunt.

My focus is now on the month of July. (my personal month of May)

Kicking off with the Glen, then the party comes to my town, (the banners are up now, causing me to squee just a little in the pit of my belly when I see them on the lamp posts) then I hop on a plane to Edmonton. That’s right. I’m all booked! It became officially official on Friday when my bosses surprised me and booked my plane tickets for Edmonton. It was their way of saying thank you for essentially putting my life on hold since April to keep the business up and running. So at least now I am guaranteed to see both of Paul’s remaining races this season.

I really feel sort of disconnected right now from the circus. I didn’t get to watch one minute of racing this month until Saturday due to work. From that I saw that it was basically status quo. Penske/Ganassi dominating, with a few underdogs scratching their way in.  Andretti Autosport is struggling again. Gotta feel for them as they seemed to have some momentum in the early races.

I did see that Princess Sparkle Pony stopped barfing up bunny fur and burping rainbows, and got her widdle feewings hurt… awwww…


Sucks for her and her entourage of sharks and sucker fish that the reality of her skillset is becoming apparent  to not only real racing fans, but the general public now that she is no longer the novelty act, but rather one of several women in the field, all of which actually put their ON TRACK careers first, and spend their time and resources bettering themselves as race car drivers, rather than building and maintaining their ‘brand’. Nothing shines a light on your own irrelevance, than someone doing the same thing as you, only better.

Bottomline is, sometimes you’re the hero, sometimes you’re the villain. You gotta take the jeers with the same conviction as the cheers. Suck it up buttercup. This is racing, not a fucking cotillion. Somebody boo’s you, or doesn’t like you? Big fucking deal.

There are a lot of drivers out there that people love to hate! Do they curl up in a ball and whine about it to the media? hell no! They wear the black hat! They revel in their villain ways! Best example of that was Paul in Montreal. The weekend spent with “Capt Quebec” will go down as one of my favorite racing memories. The boos from the crowd drowned out the sound of his car for most of that weekend. But he took it all in stride, and even played it up a little. By the end of the weekend, he was a hero again. It’s all in the attitude my friends.

Hell, a lot of people hate MY fucking guts. Do I give a shit? HELL no.

I do what I do, I believe in myself, I do it for me. If there are people are on my bandwagon taking the journey with me, great! If not? whatever.  There’s the door.

I don’t write this blog, or do any of my other race writing and photography ventures to win some internet popularity contest. The surest way to become irrelevant is to try to become relevant. It’s forced, it’s contrived, and it rings about as true as, well as true as… an example I could think of if I was more sober. *shrug*

Personally I think Danican’t is having an identity crisis now that she is being shown up by a pretty, personable, fast and GENUINELY nice female driver who’s life isn’t “scripted” by a team of reps who see a product and dollar signs, rather than a race car driver. Hell, I’m sure she herself doesn’t know where Danica the driver begins and Dancia the Brand ends.

Apparently how the handle “Boos” wasn’t part of her marketing strategy script as the hearts and flowers stepford wife-like media automaton that they unleashed last year as part of the “get Danica a big cheque, er Nascar ride” production.

I almost feel sorry for her. Almost. But you know what? You make your bed, you gotta lay in it. Lumps and all…

And with that, I’m going to shut the lid and perhaps have one more drink to salvage what’s left of my 1 day weekend (the other 2 days of my long weekend were spent working… boo!!!) before kicking back into work mode tomorrow.

27 responses to “The Month of meh…

  1. Golf clap! 🙂

  2. Paul failing to qualify was pretty shocking, and definitly disapointing. KV is kinda sad. They were great during 08, with Servia in the top ten in points, and Power 5th at Chicagoland. But then, funds dried up, and they were a mainly one car team with Moreas. But then they got pretty good at the end of last year. Sadly, this year, with Sato and Viso, plus Moreas, and then tracy sometimes too, they’re overexpanded. It sucked for Tracy, because he was the only one who didn’t wreck a car from that group.
    They could be a great team, but intil they get the funding to hold a steady, 2-3 car team together…

    I share your thoughts about the Big Two dominating. That said, Beatriz, Silvestro, and Wilson are looking good. And I agree, Danica was pathetic this month. Beatriz, Silvestro, Junquiera, Bell, and pretty much everyone else was better than her. And throwing her team under the bus, TK, PT, Buddy Lazier, and Townsend Bell didn’t do that… TK said that danica needs to fix her attitude. Defnitnly Danica’s losing being the top female driver, because Beatriz and Silvestro BOTH outqualified her on an OVAL! Danica’s suposed to be good on ovals, right?

  3. I was watching on the race control feed. Could not believe it when Tracy didn’t qualify. I knew with a half-decent car count we’d get a dramatic Bump Day but I never thought it would be him. He should’ve made it on Saturday.

    But I’ll say this – it WAS the right call to withdraw and go again. If he hadn’t, the two cars in line behind him could’ve bumped him. It turned out they wouldn’t have, but they were very much capable. I don’t think it’s Paul’s style to sit there and let them bump him out, he HAD to go again. But he touched that wall on the warmup lap and I think that threw him.

    Perhaps his days ahead lie in owning / running his own team?

    As for Danica – spot on. The marketing crap got too much, everyone’s fed up with it. And now she has peers. Now she’s up against other female drivers who are in supposedly inferior cars – and losing. It would be sad if she didn’t whine so much. Thought she might’ve learned from Kanaan by now, how to go racing without shitting on your team. And I actually liked it when she was doing well. Getting a bit fed up with her now.

    As for the race, I’m rooting for Sato. Been a fan of his for a while. Mad bastard, won’t win but can get a good finish if he doesn’t hit anything.

    • I agree. Neither Paul or Jimmy are the type to just sit there and “hope for the best” All or nothing kids.

      Paul’s gotta couple o’more years in a car yet before he turns to that side of things. I don’t really think that’s in his radar to be honest. I think if you start thinking in those terms you stop thinking as a driver.

      Hey, even I was warming up to her… and that’s saying something. Sadly I think she bought into her own hype.

      LOL on Sato. Talking to Jimmy today about Sato, he says he’s got what it takes.

      • Ya, I’m not ready to cash in on Paul’s driving days yet either. I do find it interesting that KV didn’t hit the setup right when Sato went out less than an hour before Paul and got the speed…but then, I should know better than to make a statement like that. Race cars are fickle animals, and once the heat hit, there were obviously a number of cars that were out to lunch, set-up wise. AA and KV seemed to be suffering the same malady r/t that scene.

        I don’t want to overstate it, so suffice it to say I was pretty bummed when Paul didn’t come up to speed on the last attempt. I was hoping the track temp had dropped off enough, but alas…

  4. On the bright side PT won over a lot of folks with his classy post-qualifying interview on Versus. Classy as hell.

  5. It’s amazing to see how, in five years, wide-eyed little Danica has turned into the ultimate prima donna in all of auto racing. I actually started laughing as I heard her comments and waited for the inevitable reaction from the crowd. It’s all well and good to be unhappy with your car, but that’s when you get everyone together behind closed doors in the garage and say, “alright, how do we fix this?” It’s good I’m not one of her crew members, I would have deliberately started loosening bits of her car.

    The Tracy thing was a total shock, and it was even more shocking that the mistakes of others allowed Saavedra to remain in the field. I know some people will resent Saavedra’s presence in the field because he may not have “earned it,” but you get the impression he knows how lucky he was and he’s very honored to be in the position that he’s in.

    I’m not sure of your opinion of Tags, since that god-awful version of French (personal opinion, sorry) is his first language and he probably owns a Canadiens sweater, but he IS a former Champ Car-er who ultimately flies the Canadian flag and has put together a damn good team out of nothing. Don’t know about you, but I’m all about Tags to knock out the Red/Black cars!

    Oh, and before you get too depressed, just remember that Milka Duno is NOT IN THE RACE!

    • I don’t resent anyone who drove their way into the show. That’s what it’s all about. You put the speed down, you earn your spot on the grid. Period.

      Big props to Saavedra. That kid is fast and has a good head on his shoulders. Will be a big weekend for him.

      I like Tags. I don’t like some of his business decisions… lets just leave it at that. I will him luck.

      Hey, if Milka had put a time up that earned her a spot, I would have given her the same props as the other 32 drivers on the grid.

      • I’m now pullin’ for either TK, Tags, Justin, or Graham…and maybe a little bit for Will. That’s the ONLY frickin’ bright spot about Paul not makin’ the show…it lessened, by one driver, my fragmented ‘I’m rooting for’ mindset. Nothin’ like having a focal point…

  6. Two drivers made a huge impression on me this weekend for different reasons, but maybe not so different. Kanaan and Tracy both worked so hard and worked with passion. I will be pulling for Kanaan and hoping that Paul Tracy gets a full-time Indyride for next year.

    • No argument from me on either of those points. I would love to see TK come from the back and take the big prize.

      oh and the PT/fulltime ride thing… well, that goes without saying!

  7. “If there are people are on my bandwagon taking the journey with me, great! If not? whatever. There’s the door.”

    Fuck. Yes.

    /karate kicks filing cabinet in fit of fired-up Solidarity
    //possibly breaks leg
    ///doesn’t give a shit

  8. While I’m disappointed that Tracy missed the show. I must admit that you’re yuppie-ish (spoiled rich girl that daddy brought a corvette to and not a aston martin) reaction to the entire thing gives me a little glee. Enjoy pouting. 🙂

    • I don’t know what any of that means or how it relates to Paul, myself or anything I’ve written, but if it moistens your panties here’s a special pout just for you.

  9. Great post, Meesh! Any day you can wake up and pi$$ all over Danicova for all the world to see is a good day in my books…

  10. *watches Hobbson with amazement*

    Ah, fist pumps in Solidarity!

    And, maybe Danican’t. But, they’ve got some serious problems over there when TK can barely get the car in the field after wadding up two of them. I am pretty sure he hasn’t forgotten how to drive, so the setup must have been sketchy.

  11. I don’t usually reply to these, but HOLY F***ING S***!!!!! POST OF THE YEAR FTW!!!!

  12. I just read this on June 2. My bad for being tardy. I can sympathize, Meesh. When it looked iffy that Sarah Fisher wouldn’t make it into the 500, people were looking at me like I was on suicide watch or something. Or that condescending “pooooor pressdog. Are you OK?” thing. Insert Hobbsonian karate kick here. I would have been gutted, sure, but as you said that’s how Indy works. Fastest 33 get in. One of the things I love most about it. No free passes. As for your profanity laden posts, please continue. I’m glad there’s someone out here that’s not trying to be the next Bob Costas or be first in line to spend a weekend with the Andrettis in the Hamptons or some shit.

    • lol! the fact that anyone reads my shit it at all is amazing, that you are getting to it late… no big whoop my friend!

      Ya, I felt for you when Sarah was struggling too.
      (and don’t you just hate that condescending shit??)

      Bwahahaha! I’m pretty sure my invitation to the Andrettis was “lost in the mail” a long time ago!

  13. race fan yet not a Danica fan

    I’m not a Danica fan, either, but I don’t know who you referred to when you wrote, “she is being shown up by a pretty, personable, fast and GENUINELY nice female driver.” Who is finishing ahead of her and is ahead of her in points? Danica jst got a podium finish tonight, unlike the other women – and Paul Tracy.

    • I never said anyone was finishing ahead of her. I said she was being shown up. There’s a difference.

      and EVERY other female currently racing in the series (full or part time) fits that description. But I was speaking specifically of Simona, who once she gets a season under her belt, will leave the Princess in her dust. (provided she sticks around long enough before hiding out in Napcar)

      Oh, and I would have been pretty fucking impressed with Paul had he finished ahead of her tonight, considering he wasn’t in the race… *weak slam that*

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