Tag Archives: Long Beach

What’s good for the goose…

is good for the gander! But “only if the gander doesn’t have a history of being aggressive”… er… I mean…”only if the gander “felt really bad about his actions”… I mean… er… “only if the gander is on any other team but Penske, who hands out his own brand of justice and therefore renders penalties by the series unnecessary”
Really IndyCar? Really?

Yes, that was the gist of the official explanation (hilariously called “When consistency counts”) as to the perceived UNobjective handing out of penalties this past weekend in Long Beach. I say perceived because apparently we are all WRONG. And by “we” I mean everyone who wasn’t in race control on Sunday afternoon. Continue reading

IndyCar: Long Beach Grand Prix *live blog

Yes… pick yourselves up off the floor, I’m here and I’m live! I’m not on writing duty today for http://www.openwheelworld.net, so I get to just watch and play today

As TSN has dumped the race to the deuce and time delayed it, I am comfortably ensconced in my office, using THREE monitors. Yes, you heard me… THREE!

Despite IndyCar, Versus and NBC doing everything in their power ruin the experience of IndyCar fandom for us out here on the interweb, I have a lovely super secret not legal stream so I can watch the coverage and know what is going on. (as we all saw earlier, if I were to count on the T&S from IndyCar, I would have thought Newgarden was out instead of Dempsey, and that Daly hadn’t even started… :facepalm: )

Here’s my set up:

Ok… running to have a quick pee before the start! (tmi sorry) BRB Continue reading

Grand Prix of Long Beach *live* race blog

woohoo! It’s race day Kids!

Started off with a little history throw back… then of course the Helio story… now on to Will Power, the saddest pole sitter ever…

Briscoe… always the “cool” one…

Aww sweet, PLN’s friends and family are at the track this weekend…

I still think they should make those car/transformers from the animated opening…

*back from commerical*

still doing driver intros…
and now on to the Indy 500 one off driver announcements…

PT!!! He looks fine! to the dude who texted me from the track on Friday to tell me that Paul was fat, you’re full of crap.

LOL! Dario FROchitti smack talks Andretti during Leno feature! A little more mention of the silly bet with TK… reiterates the importance of the first turn.


back… IZOD feature… Graham, RHR, and Al Unser Jr
and the predicted Princess feature…
wow… I didn’t realize that Michael won his first and last race at LB

Back with Dixon and his brutal start to the season…
(I love how both Scott and Dashley are holding the Pepsi cans. Like they are drinking a carbonated pop before the race!)

Picking the winners: Franchitti is the favorite, with Power the fave as the first timer… :bites tongue on that one:
I’m joining Jenkins on the Viso first timer

back… it’s race time kids!!!! woooot!!

Oh burn! Power isn’t firing!!
Nevermind… he is running and catching up to his rightful spot.

Robbie Thackston… LOL… oops!

Damn… now Will has no radio? geesh…

Track temp is smokin hot!

Here we go….

Green green green!! Will gets a huge jump on the field! Matos up to second, and Wilson up to 3rd!

let’s forget for a minute who the drivers are, but look at the two teams fighting for 2nd/3rd… Luczo Dragon & Dale Coyne…. oh how times have changed…

FROchitti gets around Wilson…
What is it with IndyCar and it’s revisionist history?? only the second time Power has lead laps? um he was on pole and lead for most of OZ! oh ya… OZ didn’t count right? just like LB 08 didn’t count… I call bullshit…


wow.. that overhead of the start was awesome! Nice jump by Power!
(lots of aluminum though…)

“Alex Moraes”… *sigh* Now I remember why we didn’t like Jenkins in the booth… he screws up the names!!!

Having Jan in the booth adds soooo much to the commentary! A++



rear tires are going away (12 laps in) No surprise… as the track temp is so hot. The reds must be turning into goo….
Dashley around Matos. Nice pass.

Oops! Conway into the tires.
“trouble Robbie for one of your cars” LOL!

Dashley in for a pit? What? why? did he think there was a caution?

Woah… Power slows… bunches up the field. Dixon takes out EJ… wtf?!
Gong show! Clown cars! mayhem!!

Festival of pitting…

Long stop for Wilson… gah! Power still with no communication with the crew.

And now we’re all fubared as far as who is leading. It’s off sequence pit strategies for about 3 different groups now. Ick.

What? another pass??? on camera???

Poor E.J!! My sweet boy. You are so right. Totally not your fault sweetie!

WHAT THE FUCK! Holy crap! Looks like tetris out there!

Moraes into Tags, stacking up Wilson, Wheldon, Manning, Mutoh
LOL… bad day for red, white and blue cars!

Interesting detour provision… that’s cool!


Wilson done for the day.

LOL! You know that we are on weird strategies when the order is Parko Andretti, Frochitti, Carpenter, Patrick…

Apparently the Penske back up car wasn’t quite race ready…

LOL! Dashely is just sitting pretty…

Poor Justin. That bad pit stop put him in the middle of that mess…


Dashley is leading. I guess Parko and Ed pitted. Will… get around the Princess dude! Japanica cannot podium!!

Barrett in the run off *mocks suprise* local yellows… blah blah blah… a look at the Celebrity race…

and commercial again… random…

Ed Carpenter into the tires… repeat of St. Petes, but this time he gets going.

and we’re green again (Lap 42/85)

Geesh… Helio is right up Will’s gearbox!

2 laps back to commercial…

Fuel strategy race… gah… I hate that…
Wow.. Mikey… a little unresolved bitterness towards Dario?

and back to commercial… ?????
Guess they are expecting some big action at the end, so they want to run them all now.

Power and Patrick in the Pits. What? She is sketchy out there like crazy. Power just needs to push her a little and she’s toast

Yes!! Go Will! He’s around the Princess

Dashley in…. where is Will?

woah… FCY again… Conway.. again… What a mess

WOAH!! Bad call for NHL! crew gave him the go sign!

WOAH!! fueling issue for Tags too!

back to green lap 59/85

Carpenter is a moving chicane today…
Woah! Doornbos gives Ed the chrome horn!! (wonder how you say that in dutch?)

Graham in for his drive through.


back… 66/85
talking about fuel… can they make it to the end…
2 laps and back to commercial… geezus…

and we’re back 71/85

Franchitti given the green light on fuel
Power has been told to conserve, as have Kanaan and Danica.

so much for the fuel strategy conversation. Moraes deep into the tires! (shoulda put Paul in the car guys!!) and Ed pulls a Danica and gets stuck between the safety car and the wall… No temper tantrum though…


back… they cleared Ed during the commercial. LOL!
Moraes out from the tires…
10 laps to go… still under yellow…

*back to commercial*

Back…. WOAH!! Stopped and facing the wrong way. Replay: Watkin’s Glen redux in reverse!! Briscoe into Dixon! Briscoe damaged front wing. Fixed and back out.

Green green green!
8 to go, full rich! Come on Will! Bring it home clean to the podium.

Briscoe apparently has a drive thru for that bonehead move…

Come on Will….
Marco! what the hell? Wrong place to make a pass dude! Cripes!!


back with 3 to go… 4 second lead for Dashley… Looks like Kanaan is growing his hair….

wow! nice driving by RHR there. Tags totally had him but RHR held him off…
WOAH! Tags gets him back!

Dashley gets the win!
Will gets on the podium!!
Kanaan gets a podium and a new do!

Hey Penske, you might want to rethink that deal with Will…. your key players screwed the pooch today…

Ashley is still as annoying as ever….

Will! NO telemetry and no radio! Poor bastard. He seems just gutted knowing that his

Arute just has a big ol luv affair with Danica. What the fuck is she whining about. Blend line?

LOL Dixon shows class in his interview regarding Briscoe. (mentions Watkin’s)

Helio… he’s just gonna be all happy and teary all season isn’t he?
everything is FUNtastic! LOL!

So Will is second in the championship, and sidelined… crazy…

Ok… gonna check comments and make the rounds..

Race weekend? what?

Holy crap. It was a particularly brain taxing day (week!) at work. (actually, it is everyday, which is awesome, believe me, I’m not complaining! I love my job!) And try as I might to catch the practice sessions, press conference, any semblance of coverage from the event on my breaks, the technical fubars are just insurmountable this season. Again, I have to question the decision to change the PERFECTLY GOOD video platform they used last year… but I digress…

So, even though it was a balmy, gorgeous, sunny 20C when I left work shortly after 5pm, I dedicatedly bypassed all of the very VERY welcoming patios to come home and write up all of the “happenings” from day one of the LB Grand Prix.
I figured an hour tops right?
I stuck a beer in the freezer to chill, and plonked down in front of my computer.
4hrs and one frozen solid beer later, I can just now finally sit back and absorb everything that’s happened.

I’m now exhausted however, and feeling extremely detached from the event, except for a couple of kind hearted text messages from the track. (god how I love those! even if one of them was mainly to tell me that PT was fat! LOL! poor Paul…) (oh, and if any of ya feel so inclined, do feel free to call me from pitlane or trackside, when the cars are on the go. I’ll understand that you and I can’t carry on a conversation… but I will be eternally grateful for the earful of “racing” from afar… it’s a little ritual I have with CJ, but he ain’t there this weekend)

anyway… it really sucks not being able to watch or listen to the sessions. I guess I should see if I can find a piece of shit PC for the summer and just use it for the race weekends. (when are these programmers going to wake up and realize there are folks out here that use MACS!?!!? )

Ok… so, I feel like I’ve already talked about everything… oh that’s cause I have!
Do me a favor… click the link… don’t even care if you read at this point, but we could use the hits! LOL!

So my boy was announced for the 500! Ya, at pretty much the exact moment that twinkle-toes avoided becoming some dude name Duke’s bitch for the next 5yrs.
What is it with Helio always stealing Paul’s thunder?! LOL!
I’m hoping that the rest of the deal falls into place. I can’t deal with these one race seasons. Besides I’m not sure I’ll be able to make it to Indy, and if that is my only chance to see Paul race this year, I shall be suitably pissed off. (still looking for a cot or couch or floor space for that weekend… 😉 )

I love that Mad Max was dressed up as the Gecko. What I guy!

I don’t even really know what went on on track today as all the action seemed to be happening in the press room or paddock! Hopefully I’ll be able to catch some of the action tomorrow. Just a fucking radio feed would be awesome. Why can’t they make that a separate feed from the shitty video?? If someone can figure out a way to send me an external link (separate from that stupid player) that I can open in another player, I will love you forever! No really, I will.

Alright… I can barely keep my eyes open now (the 15hrs in front of a computer screen could have something to do with it…) let alone form anymore thoughts…

More tomorrow … (afternoon… I have to work in the morning)

really? we’re gonna take that tack are we?…

It’s about to get brassy up in here y’all…
(points to disclaimer in sidebar –> )
Are we clear? Good. Proceed.

So there is a new Q&A up on IndyCar.com today with LB grand poobah Jim Michaelian. This is one of the brilliant question/answers:

Q: How big of a buzz is there now that the name drivers in IndyCar racing will be in this year’s race?

A: It’s a refreshing change from what we’ve been through in the last few years not only to have the names of the stars of the IndyCar Series but also have some assurance they are all coming, they will all compete here and our fans will have a chance to see them.

Refreshing change? Really? Y’all have decided now to spit on the series and drivers who kept your fucking event alive and kicking for all those years when the “name IndyCar drivers” and teams fucked off to the other side of the fence, in some cases mere weeks before your very event, thus jeopardizing it? (since you brought up the “assurance they are coming” thing…)

So having multiple LB winner Paul Tracy and Jimmy Vasser driving in the race last year wasn’t “name” enough for you? How about Robert Doornbos, who’s very presence in IndyCar this year saw viewership numbers in the Netherlands alone that KICKED THE ASS of the viewership numbers in the entire country of the United States? How about all the teams and drivers, who even though they had just been bent over and reamed just weeks before, still pulled it together, despite HUGE financial losses, to participate in the LB Grand Prix in 2008?

While we’re at it, let’s get a little more real shall we? How about the piece of shit cars that are going to grace your track this year? Why not be honest about that? (and before y’all get your knickers in a knot, this is not a slam on the series out of bitterness. Everyone agrees that the current formula/chassis is sadly out of date and unremarkable and long overdue for a change/upgrade)

I’m kinda glad now that I’m not wasting my money or my time to go to Long Beach this year.

Yes things change. Situations change.
We have all had to accept the change in AOW with the amalgamorphification. It’s been a hard pill to swallow for many of us, but we have done it, and in most cases been pretty fucking gracious about it.

Of course there is going to be a lot of kumbaya, ass-smoke blowing, “we’re all one big happy family” propaganda from the series and the venues, to put on a “nothing but fluffy white clouds and rainbows” appearance to the public leading up to the event, but you could still show a little more class…

Don’t spit in the face of, and bite the hand of what fed you for all those years prior to now. It’s unbecoming.

Great. Now I’m in really fucking bad mood.
Happy Friday.