sorry… No rants tonight. No clever essays, no interviews, or stats or predictions.
Just a blog.
All this was ever meant to be.
All it ended up being after all.
“Don’t believe the hype” she said. Should have listened to myself…
Feeling a little ovewhelmed (my own fault), and overworked (my own doing!) and under prepared (where did the month go??)and undeserved (…) and… and…. and…
But you know what? I’m going to Indy!
Yup, that’s right fuckers. Little ol’ fly under the radar, not good enough is hopping in a car on Friday afternoon and driving for 9hrs to take in the “greatest
testicle er spectacle in racing”
All of the hours I put in, appreciated or not, finally paid off and I was invited to the party.
I don’t know why I’ve kept it quiet so long. Guess I didn’t want to jinx it or something. Or maybe it just doesn’t seem real yet.
I’ll be spending more time on the road than actually at track, but I’ll be there damnit, supporting my boys.
My main man PT, who’s finally getting just an iota of the respect he deserves.
No matter where he finishes this weekend he is a winner in my book! Always will be!
Looking forward to seeing Patti and Allen and embarrassing my bud C.J! (Did I ever mention Paul’s son & I share a birthday? How’s that for uber fandom?)
Then I’ll throw some good luck vibes down pitlane to mon ami Tags! (Maybe counter act the Brazilian cornholing karma gods…)
Here’s the thing… The problem with being friends with drivers & crew members is the highs and lows you share with them on a deeply personal level. When Tags got caught out last weekend my heart absolutely broke for him (and Bronte and Sonja and Karina…) I’ve been there with him at the track, and off the track, and in the car driving home from the track. I know how passionate & emotional he is. I knew that look in his eyes when the camera focused on him as the “iron hand of justice” told him his time had run out.
When the team “made the call” I was torn between my glee for him and my heartbreak for Junky & Diana. (of course I knew last week that he was racing with AIM in Grand AM (see Jameson! I can keep a secret!) so that cushioned the blow a little. )
I know… “It’s racing” But I also know how hard I cried in Long Beach last year at the injustice of it all when it was aimed at Paul. None of these guys or gals deserve to be tossed aside or used like pawns in the chess game that is racing economics.
At some point I’m gonna give my little spark plug E.J. a big squeeze and ask him what the fuck happened to him over the winter! Where’s my bad boy??? Where’s the fire?? Come back!! (oh and I’ll have inappropriate thoughts for a woman of my age about a boy his age… but I digress)
Hopefully I’m finally going to meet Sarah! Yay! I have so much respect for what she’s come through to be here.
And of course I’m finally going to make the aquaintance of the creme de la creme of the blogging crew. Hope I don’t stink up the joint…
All that said, I will have about 10 mins to accomplish all of that, while I will be trying to write all the coverage for the site, will be hounded constantly by the euro team for info and interviews for them, and will be back on the road post race at around 3am to drive back to Toronto.
Will it be worth it? The fact that Paul’s on track is worth it alone. All the other stuff is gravy.
It seems every season there is something taken away from me that makes me regroup and rethink this whole stinkin racing thing. Something is amiss this year. I hate that this is my first event of the season. I hate that I have about 10 mins to enjoy it. I hate that the people who I would have shared it all with a year ago decided I was no longer relevant personally or professionally. I hate that that even matters to me. But it does. :shrug:
I think the thing I’m most looking forward to (besides Paul tearing it up baby!) is the 8 -9hrs of solitude on the way there and on the way back. Maybe I’ll keep my digi recorder on the seat beside me just incase I’m inspired. (especially on the way home)
and with that long winded post about nothing in particular, I’m going to bed. Trying to get as much quality sleep as I can before the weekend as I doubt I’ll get any then.