Ode to the Penis car…

*for Bash* (sung to the tune of Delta Dawn – Helen Reddy)

“it was 2 o’clock when we gathered for your unveiling…
“this is Indy’s future” they were wailing…
then they pulled back that red satin from your skin…
and the laughing, gasps and joking did begin…

“Delta Schlong”, oh my god that just looks wrong.
Could it be we’re being punked by Demi’s guy?
This supersonic wang ain’t gonna bring the fans back again
let’s give this strange device a wave good-bye, eye…..

feel free to continue on your own ;-)

*those of you too young to know who Helen Reddy is… A) I hate you B) Google it! *

24 responses to “Ode to the Penis car…

  1. Oh, thank you – that is lovely! :p

  2. hehe… you’re very welcome.

  3. The Delta THINGamajig is the ugliest race car (it’s not an Open Wheel car) ever conceived. The airplane tail is particularly hideous. The truly scary thing about the car are the owners behind it. They are not going to support IndyCar selecting Swift, they’ve got their money riding on the Delta THING. Open Wheel will not survive another war!

  4. Words cannot describe how stupid this thing looks. What were they thinking?

  5. Any new car design that has this many nicknames and even a song at 24 hours. Is not a good sign. :P

  6. Hi Meesh!
    Are they really, truly serious?
    I was positive that this “concept” was some sort of joke! It looks like something out of a video game for pre-teens.
    What is the function of that tail fin? And how is that thing going to maneuver through a hairpin?
    If this thing is actually approved, it’s over.
    And the remaining IRL drivers will get in line for ARCA rides.

  7. The League(Barnhart) wants to keep the Crapwagons. Fans want Swift, and team owners want Delta Wing. Hopefully Delta Wing is more of a posturing ploy to A lower prices and B get Swift or Lola instead of Dallara

  8. Yo, I can’t say a thing without feelin’ the sting,
    a mechanical organ thing called the DeltaWing.

    The more I sang, I had to call it a wang,
    add any more to it, it’d be squirin’ fluid

    Chip’s got a like, for car that’s bike, to me it’s
    a strike, this Sh**t can take a hike.

    Give me Dallara, Lola, or swift, and don’t give me no crap of it causin’ a rift.

    We don’t need more crap, stupidity between us, epecially for a dog that looks like a pen*s….

  9. After taking some time to mull it over, I am a bit more diplomatic about than I was when I first saw it. Granted, the concept car doesn’t look any prettier to me but if it is indeed true that the most important thing gained for the 2012 car via the Delta Wing is the basis of it (much lighter weight, greater aero efficiency, engine as non-stressed member, fuel flow regulation, etc.) rather than it being a narrow spec where whomever builds it has little room to deviate from the concept car look, I’m open to it.

    That said, if that is the case, the message would be more likely to be heard if the car looked better.

    • I too appreciate the “think outside the box” aspect. I also appreciate the science and thought behind it.

      That said, if it’s not esthetically pleasing, it will alienate more fans (and drivers) than it attracts. So it can be as cheap and efficient as it wants, but it will be running in front of empty stands, driven by remote control

      • Oh yeah, I agree on the importance of the aesthetic. I just meant that I want to save my venom until I know for sure that we’re stuck with the phallic car. :P

  10. I agree. I notice swift and dallara have their radical design. So, if those cars meet the objectives, could their version of the Delta Wing look more like their cars than the one we saw yesterday?? If so, I’m on board.

    • I think everyone now needs to sit in a room and find a happy medium (and less phallic looking) design that appeals to the engineers, the drivers, the fans and the pocket books of all involved.

  11. Because the amount of money invested by the IndyCar team owners in Delta THING, they are not going to accept any design concept proposed other than their own. They MUST understand that we refuse to watch something this hideous, and another Open Wheel war will lead to the end of the sport once and for all.

    I urge IndyCar fans that hate Delta Wing to FLOOD the corporate IndyCar office with emails, phone calls and personal letters sent to Brian Barnhart and Randy Bernard at the below address.

    Indy Racing League
    4565 W. 16th Street
    Indianapolis, IN 46222
    317-492-6526

  12. I knew that the DeltaWing had to be radically different (changes in wheel location/size and BARELY open wheel) in order to go 230mph on just 350hp. Even so, I was still aghast at first sight! Some have compared this to the change to rear engines or the addition of wings. I consider it more like trying to take in all the changes of the 1960s and early 1970s in one bite!

    Now after the initial shock I think the design has some merit in it’s unique look (brand identification), open spec rather than being stuck with one manufacturer, and the possibility of running near-stock engines. These are goals that we would all applaud. Maybe time will allow our virgin eyes to accept the shocking visual package.

    The unfortunate part of our situation is that the 2012 car decision will be made by a person/committee rather than letting a season of racing decide which car is better.

  13. What if this thing goes really fast and races as well as conceived?
    Maybe F1 would change their formula as well…..
    Think of all the male health vendors lining up…time to cash in!

  14. I actually love the Delta Wing just as it is. As for it looking like “it came out of a pre-teen video game”, well, that would be a great new audience for our sport, wouldn’t it? I’m sick of the same ole car we’ve had for over 30 years – give me some new and exciting, please!

  15. Thank you for nice information! I bookmarked your site for futher reading!!

    Rait Raak
    Penis Advantage scam?

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